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What is a mother to do when her teen boy has such a dirty mouth that even rough hoodlums blush at his language?  

The Wonder Twins in

Episode 2 ~ Potty Mouth

By Sasha Nexus, Edited by Holly Logan

This fan fiction piece is based on the original works, “All New Super Friends Hour"  by Hannah Barbera, copyright 1977 and "Extreme Justice #9" by DC Comics, Copyright 1995. All original characters and plot lines are the property of the owners, and any resemblance to individuals either living or dead is coincidental. This piece is for entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a copyright infringement.

When Mrs. Waterman appeared at the door in response to his knock, the hulking leather clad hoodlum exclaimed, "You've got to do something about your son.  He's swearing up and down the neighborhood and his swearing is so violent, bigoted, and depraved that it’s giving our gang a bad name.  We feel so bad about it that we even cleaned up his gang name to be "Potty Mouth."

Mrs. Waterman was stricken that such a piece of human refuse was calling her own son's language into question.  "Clarence, I will take action, since my son has left me without a choice. You can be sure this will be resolved."  She saw that using his given name had repulsed him. Mrs. Waterman showed Clarence that she meant business in the only way she could.

Clarence walked away without a single word, feeling maybe he’d gone too far.  He had a sense of foreboding about what Mrs. Waterman would do about 'Potty Mouth'.

Mrs. Waterman hated to use those automated voicemail phone systems, but she could hardly blame the Super Friends for not answering personally since they usually had world saving to do.

"Hall of Justice.  Hang up and call 911 if you need immediate help.  Press 1 for natural disasters, 2 for Teens in Trouble, 3 for .."

Twerp!  "You've reached the Teen Trouble Alert queue.  Please leave a message about your problem after the tone"  Beep!

"This is Mrs. Waterman at 112 Excelsior Way, Metropolis. My son Theodore has such a dirty mouth that it's giving the gang that he runs with a bad name.  Please send help!"  She let out a sigh of relief, wondering which of the Super Friends would respond to her cry for help.

Meanwhile, Zan and Jayna, the Wonder Twins were taking a well deserved break, enjoying Baskin Robbin’s ice cream cones.  Even Gleek was happy with his banana split.  

Jayna observed, "Zan, how can you be my twin when you bite an ice cream cone like that instead of licking it?"

Zan was saved from another lame response by the ‘Beep Beep’ of the Teen Trouble Alerts they each wore on their left arm.

"Wonder Twins your assistance is required by Mrs. Waterman at coordinates 48.85.1.255.7.  'My son Theodore has such a dirty mouth that it's giving the gang he runs with a bad name.  Please send help!' "

The Wonder twins sprang into action, standing and reaching across the table to touch finger tips. Together, they chorused, "Wonder Twin powers activate!" Jayna continued, "Shape of an eagle!" and transformed into a huge eagle.   Zan responded "Form of Water!", transforming into water that flowed into the waiting bucket that Gleek had materialized seconds earlier. Zan could still speak with his image shaped in the water.

Gleek took a firm hold on the bucket with his prehensile tail before Jayna grabbed him in her claws and began her ascent. Soon their journey ended and the eagle extended a wing to touch the water in the bucket and both of them spoke together, "Wonder Twin powers deactivate!" In a flash both Zan and Jayna returned to normal and the bucket that Gleek had held moments before disappeared. 

Jayna rang the door bell and when Mrs. Waterman opened it for them, told her, "We are the Wonder Twins, I'm Jayna and this is my brother, Zan.  We are responding to your request for help."

Mrs. Waterman invited them in and soon they all were seated in her living room.  Mrs. Waterman gave Zan a picture and Jayna a locator device. 

"The picture is of my son, Theodore.  He runs with a gang, so there is no telling where he can be.  Fortunately, his cell phone never leaves his possession and it has a locator chip in it this locator device will track.  Please help me make sure that his nickname won't be 'Potty Mouth' anymore."

Jayna answered her, "We'll do our best Mrs. Waterman to see that your child no longer has such a dirty mouth!  Let's go, Zan!"

Zan responded, "Right, Jayna! Goodbye, Mrs. Waterman."  Mrs. Waterman closed the door behind them when the Wonder Twins were gone.

It took only moment for the Wonder Twins to fly to a warehouse outside of town.  They tried the entrances, but all were locked tight. Then, from an open second story window, they heard a teen screaming obscenity.  They also observed many teens participating in the gang meeting. 

Jayna declared," That's 'Potty Mouth' Maybe a distraction will keep him there long enough for us to help him."

Together they called, "Wonder Twin Powers activate!" Jayna continued, "Shape of a bootylicious babe!" Jayna transformed into a beautiful streetwise looking knockout.  Zan responded, "Form of an ice escalator!"  Jayna stepped gracefully into the bucket that Gleek had placed on the bottom of Zan's ice escalator and rose to the top, where she gracefully stepped off of it toward a group of teens, participating in the gang meeting who were standing near the window.

While others responded in awe with phrases like, "Foxy Momma!" Potty Mouth was quickly identified both by his picture, and his response, " Bleep bleep bleep Bleepity bleep.  Bleep! Bleep!  Bleep bleep!"

Jayna was oozing sexuality as she charmed him, "After that greeting, you just have to kiss me, and I have a special treat in mind for you."

Potty Mouth responded with a sharp, "Bleeeeeep!" as he came toward Jayna.  Gleek touched Zan's ice escalator with a hand and touched Jayna with his tail.  Jayna chanted, "Shape of Xertoruodgutr (pronounced 'Orbit')". She transformed into the image of the Goddess their sister had been training with on her home planet of Exxor.  While her brother invoked a form while out of their hearing, she spoke to the teens, “You'll never go back once you've kissed a shape shifter!"

Potty Mouth was speechless as the transformed Jayna drew him into a kiss. As their lips touched, there was a flash, and Theodore was transformed into a beautiful teen girl, "Darn!, I mean, gol …ly! Oh goodness, I don't seem to be able to swear anymore."

The change in her body and her language was too much for her so she swooned.  Fortunately Zan, who had taken the form of a snowman, had positioned himself behind her to catch her.  Jayna lowered the new teen girl into a chair. 

Zan, who was being cute, said, "I could just kiss you, Sis! You are so smart!" and leaned in to kiss his sister.  Jayna responded "Zan, No!" just before he kissed her.  "Wonder Twin Powers deactivate!", Jayna chanted to end the shifting for herself and her sibling

Jayna was expecting them to have returned to normal until she saw herself twinned, except that Zan's Z adorned her chest instead of Jayna's J.  She grinned at her new twin sister, whose name just popped into her head, "Welcome, Zayna! I guess we will need to see if our powers still work so we can take Mrs. Waterman's new daughter home."

"Always practical, Jayna! Okay, let’s do it !" Jayna joined her in saying," Wonder Twin powers activate!"

Jayna chanted her standard, "Shape of an Eagle!" In a flash she was transformed into an eagle as always.

A light glistened in Zayna's eyes as she spoke, "Shape of a condor!" And Zayna was transformed into a huge condor."  Jayna observed that her power was obviously different from when she had been in Zan’s form.

Jayna scooped up Gleek, who for once, was not holding a bucket as Jayna climbed into the sky. Zayna grabbed the girl, chair and all, and lifted her into the sky as well. The clear brisk air revived the new teen girl, who enjoyed her ride home after a moment of panic.

After transforming back, Jayna escorted Mrs. Waterman's new daughter home, while Zayna and Gleek stayed outside.

"Mrs. Waterman, this is your child, who was Theodore. She can't swear anymore, so your problem is solved."

"Mrs. Waterman hugged her daughter, "My dear child, welcome home!"

The teen girl cried tears of joy at the reception her mother had given her, remembering the pain on her mother's face when "Potty Mouth" had cursed at her. She now recognized that as 'Potty Mouth', her anger had been out of frustration at not being able to be who she was truly, the girl inside, the girl she now was. The peace which now filled her soul prevented her from swearing. She was glad to finally be a girl on the outside as well as the inside. She decided to make the most of it! "Momma, I need a new name. What name would you have given me if I had been a girl from the beginning?"

She kissed her daughter on the forehead, "My dear daughter, I would have named you, Joan Ellen. Would you like that to be your name?"

"Yes, Momma! I want to be the best Joan I can be!" Joan replied with a sweet smile for her mother.

Jayna slipped away during the reunion to face the astonished look of her new sister, Zayna. "Jayna, what is an Xertoruodgutr (pronounced 'Orbit'), and please explain what it did to Mrs. Waterman's child?"

Jayna explained, " Xertoruodgutr (pronounced 'Orbit') is the name in ancient Exxorian of the Goddess of Exxor.  A kiss from the image of the Goddess changes the gender and one other thing about a person to it's opposite. Joan, which is her new name, used to only curse when she spoke, and now she can't utter a curse word at all. I'm not sure if the effect is permanent, or just to ease the gender transition. The kiss doesn't work on someone who already has been changed, so I guess she is stuck as Joan. "

Zayna replied, "Oh that explains it! It didn’t sound as though she was unhappy about the change. Guess it's time to go back to the Hall of Justice and face the Super Friends."

Jayna was troubled, wondering at Zayna's lack of curiosity about her own transformation. Did she even lack the mischievousness to use her new shape as a practical joke? What would she do?

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This story is dedicated to the memory of my friend, Joan.