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Eve Chapter 35

I woke up with an arm around me, locking me to Claire. Having a full bladder at that moment meant that something had to give. I tried to ease Claire from me but she wasn't the one to do the giving right now. In the end I had to unwrap her from me with the risk that I'd wake her.

I made it back to the bedroom then looked at the clock, it was half seven, and a Saturday, no wonder Claire was still asleep. She needed an alarm to get her moving for school, without that alarm she could sleep for Britain.

It was very tempting to slide back in beside her but I'm a morning person and wouldn't get back off to sleep. I put on a gown, Sharon had brought my own nightwear over, and slipped down the stairs to put the kettle on. Sharon had beaten me to it, she must have got up while I was in the loo. We sat at the table with our steaming mugs.

"I forgot to mention yesterday that Dr Fox called."

"Oh, what did she say?"

"That she won't know before Monday. I'm not sure what she meant."

"Thanks. I know, it's about moving my appointments."

"Right. Now, I think you are worrying too much and it's not good for you."

"I know, but look at it from my side, I have an unknown condition, I've been treated unfairly by the hospital, certain people at my school, subjected to personal attacks, Claire included, and now mum's in hospital, seeing a shrink."

"It sounds worse than it is. You're still healthy, if there was something seriously wrong with you, don't you think you would've been hauled back to that hospital?"

"I suppose so."

"You have been mistreated but it's mostly been dealt with. You should be back at school in a few weeks and you've settled with the hospital. I don't know what you got from that settlement but I'd guess you can afford that laptop you've been after?"

"Yes, I can afford a laptop and I'd like to buy it this weekend, if I can."

"So, what's left? Your mum is in the hospital but, apart from banging her head, has no injuries. She should be out today, although you look doubtful."

"She's seeing the shrink this morning, he might not let her out."

"Unless they're planning to section(*) her, she can discharge herself at any time. Remember, I was a nurse once and they'll have trouble persuading another psychiatrist that she's a threat to herself or others."

"So she'll be home today?"

"I would say so."

"Is that all? Does my life get simpler?"

"Of course, but not straight away. We might get the court hearing on Monday, but we might be denied that again. Either it happens, or it doesn't. There's no point fretting."

"So what do I have to be worried about?"

"Not alot right now, get yourself in that shower. What do you need to do in your house?"

"Hoover upstairs, change the bedding and clean the bathroom. I need fresh milk and bread, and tons more."

"I'll get the girls to help you in the house once they're up. We'll worry about the shopping a bit later. Get moving!"

I ran back upstairs and just beat a sleepy Annie into the shower. Ten minutes later I was back out, I hadn't yet put my wig on, but my hair was long enough to need conditioning regularly. I wondered if I should leave the wig off. Today was not the day for decisions like this.

Dressed in jeans and a sweatshirt I headed out the door and into my house. I firstly went into my and mum's bedrooms and stripped the beds, taking them to the washing machine. There was at least one wash load ready to go, these two beds would mean another two loads. Hmmm.

I'd finished getting the first load running when Annie appeared with a glass of OJ and a plate of toast, apparently I'd forgotten breakfast. I downed the offerings and the two of us went upstairs. I left Annie with the vacuum cleaner while I tackled the bathroom. Afterwards I retrieved a clean set of clothes for mum from her room, as well as her makeup. I placed them in a bag on the kitchen table.

Claire joined us as Annie and I finished our respective chores. I found some clean bedding and asked the two girls to sort out the beds while I went to phone to my aunt.

"Hi Eve."

"Morning. Did Dr Masters call?"

"Yes, he didn't say much though. Are you going to be there at ten?"

"Yes, but I'm not sure if she is being released, although Sharon doesn't think they can keep her there unless they section her."

"I'd have to agree with Sharon on that point. I think we'd best get moving as it's gone half nine."

I hung up and checked on the two girls. They were just finishing my bed but told me to leave them there, Claire asked about food.

"I need to get some fresh milk, bread and salad."

"We'll do that, do you need anything else?"

"I'm just thinking about lunch right now. Here's a tenner, will that do?"

"It shouldn't be that much, you'd best get moving."

I gave Claire a kiss, Annie tried to look disgusted, and I headed out the door, collecting mum's clothes on the way. Sharon was waiting for me, she seemed to know what the girls were doing. It didn't take long to get to the carpark, of course I still didn't have that permit so had to feed the machine with coins. We walked past the main reception desk and up to Neurology.

Mum was sat up in bed with Dr Masters at her bedside. I don't think she was very happy but brightened a bit when she saw the bag I was carrying. I figured I would take the initiative. "Dr Masters, I'm sorry for interrupting but I'm here to collect my mother."

"I'm done here anyway. Your mum was discharged half an hour ago but has been waiting for clean clothes."

He was obviously trying either to tell a bad joke or wind me up. I didn't bite, regardless. I suggested mum needed some privacy. My aunt had arrived and started drawing the curtain, I put the clothes on the bed and left mum to dress. She still wasn't comfortable with her new daughter seeing her without wearing at least some underwear. My aunt stayed to help her. Of course I'd managed to forget a hairbrush but my aunt had hers.

Sharon and I waited at the nurses' station, but didn't see any nurses or doctors. Was this normal for the weekend? Mum and aunt Sue appeared after a few minutes. Mum didn't wear skirts often so I'd decided I'd put her in a skirt for the day, partly as a cruel joke. She hadn't realised it was me who'd chosen her clothes so all I got was a kiss and we headed to Sharon's car. The ride home was in silence, neither Sharon or myself could find anything sensible to say.

My aunt had followed us in her own car and parked on our drive, behind mum's car. The rest of us disembarked from Sharon's car and walked across. Annie opened the front door and retreated to the kitchen. Mum still hadn't said anything but looked around the lounge as she sat down.

"I see you have done some cleaning."

"Yes, Annie and Claire helped me."

That seemed to be the end of the conversation as Annie brought a tray of cups into the lounge. Claire followed with some biscuits, chocolate cookies by the look. We sipped the tea that had been poured, waiting for the first comments. My aunt was first.

"How are you Debbie?"

"If you mean physically, then I'm fine."

"You know what I mean."

Mum looked around the room, as if looking for inspiration. Instead, Sharon decided to speak.

"Eve, could you and the girls go to the kichen?"

I guessed mum wasn't comfortable discussing her talks with the psychiatrist in front of me, Claire and Annie. We picked up our cups and walked, closing the door behind us. I put the radio on in the kitchen to show mum that we weren't listening.

I saw the carton of fresh milk on the worktop and went to the fridge to put it away. I found almost a full fridge, including some minced beef and fresh plum tomatoes. On the worktop were kidney beans and a bag of rice. Have you ever had the feeling you'd been stitched up?

"Eve, we figured you'd want to do something to help your mum. I thought a chilli would be good, to replace the one you didn't get on Wednesday."

I grabbed Annie and gave her a hug, Claire looked upset so she got a hug as well. My eyes welled up and Claire offered me a tissue.

"Thank you. That was a touching idea, but I only left you ten pounds. You must have spent another twenty or thirty?"

"Don't worry about that. How about we help you get the chilli started, then we can organise lunch?"

I took the hint and started working on the evening meal. The girls helped me chop the onion, garlic and two red jalapenos. By the time the door was opened from the lounge we had a bubbling pot and lunch started. I had found a wholemeal loaf on the side, a cooked gammon joint and some strong cheddar in the fridge, plus a ready supply of salad. We started putting a ploughman's lunch together.

"Eve, could you join us?"

* http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sectioning#United_Kingdom

Eve Chapter 36

I followed my aunt into the lounge and sat opposite mum. I knew from the time I'd been in the kitchen that they must have spent a long time talking, or at least listening. I wasn't certain what would happen so I folded my hands on my lap and waited. Aunt Sue spoke first.

"Eve, as you'll have gathered we have all had a chance to air our views. I asked Sharon to stay as she has known both of you for many years and is better placed than me to give a view on each of your lives. I have not asked her to spy or divulge anything that might be deeply personal, more to give an overview of how you reacted to things happening around you.

"As you know, we've been concerned for you, but not just since you were taken into hospital six weeks ago. We all knew something was wrong but couldn't place it. We told your mum but that is where the next problem began. Debbie, can you take over?"

"Eve, believe me, I never wanted to harm you. Sharon and Sue told me that something was wrong, they saw changes in you that I couldn't, or wouldn't, accept were abnormal. I thought that, finally, my wishes might have been coming true."

Mum stopped at that point and hung her head. Sue, who was next to her, handed mum a tissue from a half empty box. I was feeling parched so put my head through the kitchen door and asked for some glasses of water. I sat back down, mum had composed herself and grasped that tissue as if it was a life or death situation.

"Eve, I should be angry for what happened the other afternoon but it took that much for me to realise what you went through in hospital, the tests, the uncertainty. I now know that life's too short for grudges and secrets. I promise we will work through this together."

Claire brought four glasses and a jug of iced water into the lounge then retreated to the kitchen. I poured the water and waited for each of the adults to take a sip.

"Mum, I was scared. I am scared what is happening to me, but I am more scared what is happening to you. I know we said some nasty things to each other on Thursday, but I wanted you to get help. I didn't want you to end up on a hospital trolley though."

I was reaching for my water again but my hand was shaking. Sharon came over to me and gave me a hug, before returning to her own chair. I walked over to mum and held her hands. We sat there for another minute, oblivious to Sharon and aunt Sue's presence. I didn't know what to say next so I just held mum's hands.

"Eve?"

"Yes mum?"

"Dr Masters wants to see me again. He wants to help me. I need help." She burst into tears. I wrapped my arms around mum and hugged her. My aunt brought a few more tissues over and we dried our eyes.

"Mum, if you need help then we'll work through this together, right? We have friends who'll support us, but what's done is done, we can't undo the past. Even if I wanted to be Simon again, I don't think I could, not now. We need to move forward."

"Eve, my daughter, that is very profound, but you're right. I'm sorry for what I've done, and I promise you and me will work together. No more unilateral decisions?"

"Agreed."

I gave mum a kiss and sat down again, sipping my water.

"Debbie, that wasn't difficult, was it?"

"Sue, thank you for being here, you too Sharon."

"Ladies, if you're hungry, lunch is served." I opened the kitchen door. The smell of the chili con carne hit everyone, a glance at the hob told me that it was now off the heat.

"Chili?"

"Not yet, a good chili takes more than half an hour!" Mum smiled, the others looked at us blankly. "We've put a ploughman's lunch together. Please take what you need."

It was mum's turn to pick at her food, but at least she was back home. I waited until we all returned to the lounge before I gave mum the next important bit of news. I was not sure at all what she would think; I needed Claire and Sharon
with me so I wasn't trying to explain on my own.

"Mum, we said there would be no secrets."

"Yes?"

"Claire and I have been sleeping together for the last three nights." I pulled Claire closer to me.

"I know."

"Oh."

"Sharon told me yesterday morning. She came to see me while you were at the doctor's surgery. I was wondering when you'd tell me, but I can't say I'm happy, or surprised."

Aunt Sue had sat open mouthed. She knew I loved Claire deeply but this was obviously news to her,

Annie excused herself during this conversation and headed to the kitchen. A few minutes later she returned with a tray of tea cups and a steaming teapot.

"So, what do you intend to do?"

"What, how?"

"Sleeping arrangements?"

"We haven't discussed it. The last three nights just happened, because of circumstances. If it's alright I'd like Claire to stay here with me tonight and maybe we can talk about it later?"

"Sharon, is that okay with you?"

"If that's what the girls want, and they keep their promises."

Eventually everyone left, leaving just the two of us. Mum showed me her discharge letter, the main issue was her continuing appointments with Dr Masters. The siezure was diagnosed as being connected to severe stress, our argument was just the trigger. Mum had been given a mild anti-depressant and ordered not to get wound up, but to talk - and listen.

I sent mum up to the shower. She hadn't moaned about her skirt and put it back on when she returned. I looked at her as she came down the stairs, her only comment was that it was "comfortable." She'd put some better makeup on and now looked good on the outside, I hoped the inside matched.

I went upstairs and had a shower myself. When I returned to the kitchen, having put a skirt on to replace my jeans, I found mum leaning on the sink sobbing.

"Mum, it's alright."

"Eve, I'm scared."

"Mum, it's alright, I'm here. Just promise that you'll be here for me." I started crying as well. Where's a box of tissues when you need one?

Mum stripped off her rubber gloves and left them on the drainer, I now had two damp patches on the back of my top. We walked back into the lounge, sat next to each other and found the missing box. I figured it was my turn to saw something profound again.

"Mum, we're not the same people we were six weeks ago. I don't just mean that Simon has gone but I've grown, I've developed." Mum cupped her own breasts at that comment. "I'm stronger now, but I'm also fragile, if that makes any sense, my life has been turned upside down and so has yours. We have suffered medical trauma, abuse, legal intervention and unexpected love. Is it any surprise that we both ran a little off the rails? But don't expect those men in white coats just yet."

Mum had to laugh at that one. We just sat and talked, I made mum tell me everything that had happened after she woke up in the hospital. Just by reliving the experience I could see that she had been petrified.

"I kept wondering what would happen to me, that's the worst part. No-one tells you anything."

"Yeah, I know that one."

"So, what about your adventures?"

It was now my turn to explain the past few days. She smiled when I told her how I'd stood up to the security goons but questioned my wisdom in starting the argument in the first place on Wednesday morning.

"Mum, it's done, please don't try and analyse the past as we can't change it, only learn from it."

For no good reason I suddenly remembered the washing machine. I'd last seen it at nine this morning so I got up and dashed to the utility room. There was one load spinning, one load ironed and, looking out the window, I could see a third load blowing in the wind. There was nothing waiting to be washed. The girls!

On the way back I picked up the calendar from the kitchen and suggested mum put her appointments on it.

"Eve, have you forgotten something?"

"Hmmm, like what?"

"It's the girls' birthday on Friday."

"Oh damn."

"We'll sort something out. Now, who's having dinner?"

"Can I get Claire over, and can we open that bottle of red?"

"I don't see why not. That letter says nothing about not drinking and one glass wouldn't hurt anyway. Go and get Claire, I'll warm the chili and get some rice started."

The rest of the evening was warm and very comfortable. Claire, mum and I made small talk, mum had fully accepted that Claire was now very much a part of me. We changed into outr nightwear and watched the dancing on BBC1 before heading upstairs for some serious cuddling.