Dance, Dance, Dance
Part Two - Cheerleader MIA
Dance, Dance, Dance
Part Two - Cheerleader MIA
"Do wah diddy diddy, Do wah diddy diddy, Do wah diddy diddy, one-a, two-a,
Do wah diddy diddy, Do wah diddy diddy ,Do wah diddy diddy, one-a ,two-a,
three-a, four-a ..."
That was the sound of the music inside my head as I remembered our practice. Jenna initiated the routine with Jenna and me, side by side. The silent count started as Jenna slapped her thighs with her arms coming down into first position. Once the routine started, it was as though I was not the same person at all, as if my body was possessed by a great dancer and gymnast. It was as though while I was doing the routine with Hailey, Kendra and Star with Jenna watching that I was in possession of something special. It was not as grand as the secrets of the universe but it might be the secret of my real identity.
But all of a sudden our world came tumbling down. Jenna's mom was assigned overseas as a nurse at the hospital at Ramstein AFB in Germany. Jenna's Mom had been learning a specialty in college that had kept her in the same assignment here at Lamur AFB since Jenna had started high school. With her graduation, the Air Force needed her overseas for duty.
I felt really left out that Jenna never came to me to say goodbye in person, like she did with the girls on the cheerleading squad and even Chelsea. Although she must not have considered me a friend, I considered her one. It hurt deep that I had to hear about everything second hand.
Hailey had become cheerleading squad Captain with Jenna leaving. Her idea was that with the competition looming it would be impossible to get another girl into championship form with the routines. Turning me into a girl ,so I could do the routines with them, was the only solution.
After Friday Supper when Hailey had stopped Dick Wallace from removing my costume to grope me after already stealing a french kiss from me, I knew that Magick was real. As impossible as it sounded to turn me into a girl, I kinda believed she could do it. I really did not want to let the team down!
"I said that I would do it, Hailey!"
"O Goodness Deej! You are a life saver!"
"I don't know about that! I enjoyed helping Jenna and y’all practice."
"We need you Deej! Jenna's already gone overseas with her Mom! The routine only works if we all move as a unit."
"I could not believe it when her Mom's posting changed so suddenly. It is very hard to be parted from Jenna. Why couldn't she stay with someone else to finish the term?"
"Jenna's Mom wouldn't trust anyone to watch her since she feared her estranged husband would kidnap her. We all miss her. She was so heart broken that we would have to drop out with only Kendra, Star and me left. When we are able to show off her brilliance for inventing the routine, Jenna will be proud that it wasn't in vain."
"Do you think we could really pull this off?"
"As long as you don't lose your cool everything will be fine."
"But what about the details? Even though I can move like a girl in the routine, I don't know the first thing about being a girl. I'm about the right size for a girl, but I don't have the right shape for a girl. Also, people know me as a boy, not as a girl."
"Well we will have to bring your mother in on this for sure. No offense, but your father passing away will make things easier. We'll all go with you to your mother and get her blessing for what we have in mind. The other stuff, your mind and body and how other people see you, we three will divide things up to make it so you will be able to cope."
"How did you divide that up?"
"I'm going to take care of your body issues, Kendra will take care of your mind issues, and Star will take care of how others see you."
"I'm still clueless how you feel you will manage that, but I can wait on that ‘til you all speak to my mother."
"Good deal! Kendra! Star! Chelsea! We are taking Deej home and filling in 'her' mother on the plans!"
"We have plans?" asked Kendra as Star bumped her playfully and she exclaimed, "Oh, those plans! OK I'm ready."
We all climbed into Hailey's pink convertible that whisked us away for a boisterous ride over to my house.
I rang the doorbell since I was bringing home company. Mom greeted us at the door, "Dee Jay! Girls! Come in. To what do I owe this pleasure?"
"Mrs. Russell, we'd like to talk to you about Deej, uh Dee Jay, but first can we show you this video of our practice?"
"Sure Hailey! Dee Jay could you put on the DVD in the living room and we'll watch it in there."
I led the girls into the living room and everyone got settled while I put it on. The video was one of me standing in for Jenna at our last practice with her showing our championship form for the competition.
When it was over, my mother was very impressed with the team's performance, "Girls, when I was in high school, our cheerleading team won our competition and that routine that Jenna invented should win you the trophy. I am so proud of all of you. Where is Jenna by the way?"
"Jenna's mom was reassigned overseas and Jenna went with her. The competition is a few weeks away and there is not a girl at the high school who could learn the routine and have it at championship form by then."
"What are you asking me, Hailey?"
"We would like for Dee Jay to do the routine with us for the competition. Dee Jay knows it and is on the squad already. All we would have to do is to get Dee Jay to look like one of us before then."
"Then Dee Jay would have to become a girl, and not just any girl, a cheerleader, in order to do the routines. This would not work with Dee Jay in the mascot suit would it, Hailey?"
"Yes, Mrs. Russell, we would like for Deej to become a female cheerleader. She already moves like one of us. She only has to look the part. It's like another costume since she is used to being a mascot."
"Hailey, you realize that you are already referring to Dee Jay in the feminine. And its not quite like the mascot since Dee Jay would have to be a girl 24/7 in order to pull this off."
"We need her! There is no one else who can do this. Without her we are out of the competition."
"Girls, I haven't said ‘no,’ yet. Just how did you expect to pull this off even with my full cooperation?"
"Well we have a cover story in mind for Dee Jay to explain a female twin sister showing up right now with his disappearance. Star is secretly a geekette hacker who can arrange for all the paperwork and proper entries in computer systems to validate her with everyone including the school and the competition authorities. Kendra's secret is that she was born Ken and got some special help to be the girl she is today. Kendra can help Dee Jay cope with living as a girl and getting her adjusted. My secret is that I am a Wiccan and I know a spell that can give a boy the chance to find out what it is like to be a girl. It would last long enough for us to do the competition. If Dee Jay was meant to be a girl then, like Kendra, would remain a girl, but if not, then Dee Jay would completely revert back to being a boy with no adverse effects."
"I guess that if Dee Jay really has a girl's mind then it would be better to find out sooner, than later, as far as that goes. Dee Jay, What do you say about this?"
"Mom, It sounds like that my friends have all the bases covered and that they will take care of me. I want to help them and being a girl can't be such a bad thing since half the people on the planet cope with it well"
"Its not a bad thing Dee Jay for those who were born to it. We don't know that about you, yet. How long will the spell last, Kendra? And can you bring Dee Jay out of it before it runs its course if Dee Jay shows distress in this situation?"
"Ordinarily it would last for a month. The spell's intent is to do no harm and distress on Dee Jay's part would allow me to release Dee Jay early, even if we had not completed the competition."
"Both Dee Jay and I want you all to succeed so I will give my blessing to Dee Jay becoming a cheerleader for the next month to complete the completion. If it turns out that I really have a daughter permanently, I will do my best to help her adjust. I want to be included in everything that
you do on Dee Jay's behalf."
"I promise you will be, Mrs. Russell. What would Dee Jay's name have been if she had been born female?"
"She would have been Denise Janice. Dee Jay would you like for that to be your name for now?"
"Yes, Mom. I want to be your daughter, Denise."
"Both Star and I have some preparations to make before we do our part to bring Denise to life. Guess we need to go. See you in school, Deej."
"Take care, y’all"
The girls left and a silence fell on both of us until I broke it, "You are the coolest mom ever to help us with this so we can have a chance of winning the competition."
"Denise, being a young woman brings opportunities and challenges that you can't begin to imagine right now, all by themselves. Coping with those having never grown up a girl and being thrust into it immediately makes it just so much harder. Your friends are in this for the team, but I'm in it for you. Please don't forget me as you are caught up in the experiences of this since I can help you in a way that your friends can't having lived thru some of the experiences that you are about to have."
"Momma, I love you always and I know you love me. I'll keep you close. You think they are missing something in their haste to get me to a way that I can help?"
"I'm sure of it. Even Kendra may not realize now what you will be going through. Think about it. Do you remember Kendra ever being Ken?"
"I've seen videos of Kendra as a four-year-old girl."
"I believe when that spell changed Kendra permanently into a girl then it did it retroactively to her conception. That must have erased all the consequences of being thrown into the middle of things. And Kendra owes Hailey a lot since she saved Kendra from her fate of being in the wrong body so she is not likely to reveal any of the downsides to what you are going to go through out of loyalty to Hailey and the team."
"What could happen in a month that could be that traumatic?"
"A boy could happen to you. Lets think about that spell a little more. Suppose you were to get pregnant under this, ‘Do no harm’ spell, what do you think might happen?"
I hesitated to answer and wondered why Momma had brought up such a thing. It seemed to me that she was familiar with this situation having encountered it before. How? When? Why? I wasn't sure that I wanted to know those answers. Do any of us really know our parents? Ignoring why Momma asked, there still was the question, which itself was valid, and I tried to answer as best I could. I could tell I was already in over my head and I looked to Momma to throw me a lifeline to get me through this.
"I might not be able to get an abortion and I might stay a girl for the entire pregnancy. Momma can I get birth control, like immediately after they change me to Denise for real? Could you like... take a vacation, and, like .... watch over me ‘til this is over?"
"I love you, Denise. I have that vacation time I was banking in case an emergency came up and this looks like this is it. Let's see. I could come across as being one of those mothers who smother their children trying to relive their lives through them, a real stage mother. I could be appointed adult supervisor over the cheerleaders. They haven't needed one with Jenna in charge, but I bet I could make a case both to have one and for me to be it over the next month since she left and Hailey is not used to being in charge. Of course, that would make me a chaperon for the competition as well. Will that suit you, Denise? You'll be seeing a whole lot of me and I'll have to act the part."
"This daughter is going to love having a stage mother."
I hugged Momma and gave her a kiss on her cheek. Momma hugged back and then we broke.
"Denise, I'm going to go ahead and set up that vacation and we'll have to wait ‘til they do whatever with the records for me to put the rest into place. I'll save the stage mother act ‘til things get going since I am sure they are not going to want the adult supervision."
"I want it Momma! Thanks so much for watching out for me."
"Take care, Kiddo. I'll make those calls and be back to talk some more about what you've gotten yourself into."
Momma went upstairs to her room to make those calls. That gave me the time to think about what all Momma and I had talked about. As Dee Jay, Mom and I had been close but it seemed like, as Denise, we would be a lot closer. Some of that I'm sure would be that mother / daughter thing which I had observed in my friends but never expected to experience. I was about to get it very intensely because I asked for it and need it. I thought about my dancing ability, and how I was able to emulate girl's movements. Men could dance, of all lifestyles, so being able to dance like a girl did not necessarily mean that I was one. Lots of male actors have played women's parts but that did not make them women either. In the end, the spell having giving me a month to be sure whether I had a female spirit, would decide my fate a lot more suddenly and conclusively than those transgendered girls in that documentary I had seen.
Momma was back with the gleam in her eye that I saw when she felt that she had successfully set up a project, "Denise, I have the next month off to be with you. I also have called some
friends to help out with advice and to look over your friends’ handiwork. I met all of these women in college and after explaining the situation they all volunteered to help. Rebecca is a Wiccan and she is now on a plane from San Antonio to see what kind of spell Hailey weaves and to put right any mistake she might make. We won't see Jennifer in person, but she will monitor the hacking that is done on your behalf by Star and make sure that is right. Alicia is a transwoman and she will be visiting later on after you've started to get into some situations to help you out, especially with the emotional issues."
"What emotional issues, Momma?"
"You are going to experience so much more intense emotions than what you are used to and you still don't know how to deal with the ones that you have, yet. Reacting only from emotion, can make a challenge a lot harder. You will be dealing with interpersonal issues that would not be easy for you even if you had grown into this, instead of being thrust in the middle of things."
"It seems like you have got everything covered, Momma. Thank you for being so wonderful to me."
"I've done my best for you, Denise. Even with the best planning there is always the unknown to deal with and that's why I want to be close so I can catch what ever it is and help you through it."
The phone rang then and Hailey was at the other end. She told me that the hacking was going well and that she had the spell ready but we would have to wait until midnight in order for it to be effective. We were to meet her in the grove of trees near the edge of town where there were rumors of strange happenings going on. Hailey told me that it had been a sacred place for ages and the best place for us to do the spell.
After I got off the phone, I relayed everything that Hailey had said to her, "That will work out well, Denise. Rebecca's flight will be in before then, so she can go with us to where the spell will take place."
"I feel a whole lot better about this since you stepped in Momma. I didn't really know what I was getting into but I wanted to help. Now I know a little more and I have you and your friends to watch out for me."
"Thank you, Sweetheart. That means a whole lot to me. There is a lot to being a daughter that girls learn to cope with but I'll try to make it as painless as possible for you."
:"I love you Mom, what shall we do while we wait for your friend to arrive?"
"I have just the video to watch and I hope it will introduce you to a new perspective."
Before she put on "You've Got Mail," starring Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks, she asked me to imagine myself as Meg Ryan's character. They go through a lot of situations since they are internet pen pals, but don't know that they really know each other in real life. Tom Hank's character finds out, but is faced with the consequences of his actions toward her in business. In the end, Meg Ryan's character finds out the internet pen pal's identity and they live happily ever after. I learned a lot from the experience and I think that she put that one on because it deals with a secret identity and I was about to obtain a secret identity, myself. .
I left with a glow from the vicarious experience of the movie. I think I might have even had a tear. Soon Momma drove us to the airport to meet her college friend. It was nice to see the recognition on their faces. Then they caught up with what each other did over the years that seemed to pass in a few moments.
They then turned to me and Momma introduced us, "Rebecca, this is my child, Dee Jay. Dee Jay this is my college friend, Rebecca."
"I'm very glad to meet you Miss Rebecca. Thank you for dropping everything to help."
"I'm glad to meet you, too, Dee Jay. When your mother told me what you were about to do, I felt this was the place for me to be."
"Let's get us home. Rebecca, you'll be able to relax a bit before the big event starts."
"I'd like that, Patricia. I only have this carry on, so we can go straight to your car."
The three of us walked to Momma's car and got in and then the real conversation started. In private Rebecca followed my mother's lead and started calling me Denise. I guess it was to get me used to what would be real in a little while.
"Denise, you are very loyal to take on something like this. It's amazing that your friends have just the gifts that could keep this from being a comedy of errors. The rest of your mother's friends and I will try to make sure that they get it right. You still have the tough job of becoming a different person in a short amount of time and that's something even with all the help that you will need to do yourself."
"Miss Rebecca, Can you tell how this is going to turn out with me?"
"Denise, I know how it is supposed to turn out, but magic is unpredictable, so the final determination will be living through it. The kind of spell that is on Kendra that Hailey intends to put on you could force you to be female both physically and mentally, if you become a mother. I know what can happen but it is up to you what will happen by the choices that you make. Help
will be available but you have to accept it for it to do any good. I have a bit more skill than Hailey so I'll make it as easy on you coping with the changes that I can."
"Miss Rebecca, how will they do it?"
"We White Lighters draw strength and energy from nature and put it to useful purposes like the spell that will allow you to be a girl. A circle of like minded individuals all drawing on the power and focusing it on the person or object in the middle. I imagine that Hailey will be with her circle in a spot that tends to focus the energy and aids in its collection. They will recognize me as, at least, a peer and maybe even a mentor. They will allow me to enter the circle with them and it is there that I can best do what I have promised."
"What about you, Mom, if I am in the middle and Miss Rebecca is part of the circle?"
"I'll be close by, Sweetheart, but far enough away that nothing unintended strikes me as well since we have family ties. That's why Rebecca is standing in for me since my presence where everything is occurring could make some unexpected happenings to occur and this will be hard enough if it works out as planned."
We waited for a while and finally Hailey called and told me to hand the phone to my mother so she could tell Mom how to get to the place that they had set for my transformation. Mom indicated that it was in an ancient grove of live oak trees that was sacred to the Indians and near by the most sacred place there was a place of meeting. I remembered that a developer had bought it and wanted to bulldoze the whole thing, but mysteriously changed his mind and donated it to be a perpetual conservation area that was not be disturbed in any way, but open to people to enjoy but they had to leave their technology, even cars behind when they went into the preserve. I would not have been surprised if the circle had done what the conservationists and historians could not and get through to the developer.
We drove to the parking lot and Mom waited with the car outside the preserve. Ordinarily the gates were locked this late, but mysteriously they were open as Miss Rebecca and I went along the path to the area where Hailey waited for us.
Hailey was a bit surprised that I was not alone, but immediately went up and greeted Rebecca with two kisses on each cheek.
"Child of Light, we are honored by your presence. I was not aware that Dee Jay knew anyone of your eminence."
"Her mother remembered me from college and I was intrigued by Denise's sacrifice and your preparation that I had to come join with you in this worthy endeavor. I am Rebecca, and you must be Denise's friend, Hailey."
"I am Hailey. We would be honored for you to join us. The Circle awaits in the clearing. Deej, all you will have to do is stand in the center and we'll do the rest."
"Thank you Hailey for making this impossible dream come true. I can't wait to really fit in and dance with y’all."
"That's the plan, De...nice. I guess you are not going to be the only one to have to get used to things being different."
The three of us fell silent as we came into the clearing. Five girls stood in the circle with two spots vacant. I didn't recognize the other girls but one of the five was Courtney. I smiled at her and she smiled back at me. I passed thru into the center where Hailey indicated I should stand.
When Hailey and Rebecca took the empty spots the seven of them were equidistant from each other around the circle. I felt some kind of power as the earth beneath my feet vibrated with energy. The seven of them sang in perfect harmony. It was a song I recognized from church called Lord of the Dance from a traditional Celtic melody with words by Sydney Carter. It was unexpected to hear it being sung in the circle did not make it any less appreciated.
"I danced in the morning when the world was begun
I danced in the Moon & the Stars & the Sun
I came down from Heaven & I danced on Earth
At Bethlehem I had my birth:
I danced on a Friday when the sky turned black
It's hard to dance with the devil on your back
They buried my body & they thought I'd gone
But I am the Dance & I still go on!
They cut me down and I leapt up high
I am the Life that'll never, never die!
I'll live in you if you'll live in Me -
I am the Lord of the Dance, said He!
Dance then, wherever you may be
I am the Lord of the Dance, said He!
And I'll lead you all, wherever you may be
And I'll lead you all in the Dance, said He!
(...lead you all in the Dance, said He!)"
They danced in place as they sang as the power grew greater and greater. I'm not sure that the words I heard was what they actually sang or if I perceived them in a way that was comforting to me. Suddenly, the wind blew from all directions into the center of the circle keeping me in place so I could not move if I wanted to move. Clouds rolled in from nowhere, covering the area, and we all became enshrouded by a thick fog forced in by the winds, piling up so that I could no longer see the girls in the circle and they could not see me. I felt goose bumps when a huge electrical charge struck the ground around me. Yet, I was unharmed, as a clap of thunder followed almost immediately. Thankfully, I did not have to bear any more of the sensory overload as I passed blissfully into unconsciousness.