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My name is Sam Parker, and I am 40 years old, single and I live in Boston. I am an independent sales representative for manufacturing companies, and my territory covers New England and New York State. My largest single account is in Montreal, Canada and I am up there every other week. It is a great deal of driving and many nights in motels but I have no family to miss, and it allows me to indulge in my hobby, cross-dressing, as much as I want.

Now I am bisexual and in my male persona I enjoy female companionship, but what really turns me on is sex with a man when I am in my female persona. Unfortunately I had a very bad experience with a creep I met on line last year so I have been oh so careful about dating men. That has resulted in very little sex and a great deal of frustration and pent up desire for Samantha, my female alter ego. Now looking back, that was probably what caused my life to be so completely changed. There may have been some red flags but I didn't see them, probably because I wasn't looking for that kind of trouble.

He said his name was Gerry Siegal, he was tall about 6"1", dark, almost swarthy, and while his features were a bit sharp to be considered truly handsome I had found him to be very attractive.
I met him on line, he seemed new to that scene. We went through the usual preliminaries, winks, emails, chatting, and camming. I noticed a slight accent and he said that he had grown up in France. He finally asked to meet in person. I told him that we could meet in a public place and get acquainted, but there would be no sex. If I liked him and felt safe we could then set up a date. I expected he would resist but he readily accepted my conditions. We agreed to meet in two days.

I was anxious and excited when the day came. I took a long relaxing shower, and shaved my body all over. I put on my breast forms with medical adhesive. Next I did my makeup; I used a moderate amount of eyeliner and applied my false eyelashes. I had chosen a medium red color for my lips and nails. I was going for a classy look rather than my more commonly used tarty or even slutty look. I used a lip liner to enhance the outline of my lips and achieved a very full look. I wore a sleek, straight shoulder length Blonde wig with bangs. I put on a black waist cinch-er with garters, very sheer thigh high black stockings. I wore a black and white dotted, low cut dress with a short white jacket with three quarter sleeves that came down just below my bust line. I put on a pearl choker, and drop pearl earrings, and slipped my feet into 3" pointed toe black pumps. I full length mirror and I had to pause and think to myself "You really pulled this look off Samantha"
I grabbed my purse went out and got in my car and headed for the beach

I picked a place along Revere Beach Boulevard across from an ice cream stand. It was late September and there would be people about but it would not be crowded.
I pulled head into the sea wall and sat on the hood of my car, I lit a cigarette, and took a deep drag, and exhaled slowly as I looked out at the ocean. I heard a voice say
"How very beautiful!"
I turned and saw Gerry, and smiled and said "I know I do love the ocean"
He replied “I wasn't talking about the ocean"
He had me right there, I thought to myself, how foolish I was to insist on no sex at this meeting, but a gurl need to have some standards.
We chatted about nothing in particular, all the time I was batting my eyelashes and licking my lips trying to make sure he wanted me as much as I wanted him.

At last he said “Samantha you are more captivating in person than I ever could have hoped for, I simply must see you again and very soon"

Now playing hard to get is only something I can do with credibility if I really am indifferent toward the guy.
In my unbridled lust I said" I am free tomorrow evening!"

He smiled broadly put his hand on my knee causing me to almost cum in my panties and said
“Why don't you come to my place?"

I had not completely lost all my senses, and warily I replied

"Gerry, I would feel more comfortable if we got a motel room"

He said "Of course, whatever you wish, I'll arrange it"

With that he leaned over and his lips briefly touched mine, I felt tingling sensation all over my body.
He said “I must go, or I won't be able to control myself any longer, see you tomorrow"

Then he was gone and I just sat there aching, thinking this would be the longest 24 hours of my life.

Saturday night came and I must say I was dressed or undressed to the 9's. I had on my breast forms, a waist cinch-er, thigh high sheer black stockings, 4 "stiletto heels and nothing else underneath. My dress was a little v neck that came to just above my knee. I had shimmering opaque jacket that went over it. I chose a wavy shoulder length blonde wig, lots more eye makeup, dark red lipstick and nails to match. To complete the look I went with rhinestone chandelier earrings and necklace and for good measure I doused myself with Nina Ricci perfume.

Gerry had text-ed me the number of the hotel room. As I drove to the motel, my anticipation was palpable. I was already getting hard.

I parked and confidently entered the lobby, walking with a feminine swing to my ass and reveling in the sound of my heels and the rustle of my dress.

I knocked on the door of the room and he opened it immediately
He looked at me and said "You are so beautiful, would you care for a drink?

I said "No thank you"

He lit two cigarettes at once and handed me one and said "I know you enjoy a smoke"

I accepted it took a long drag and turned and tilted my head up and exhaled, then said "and I like cigarettes too"

I sat down and crossed my legs; my skirt rode up exposing a great deal of thigh. He stared at my legs. Shamelessly I made no attempt to cover up.

He smiled and was playful, asking "what's your name gorgeous?”

"Samantha" I purred

"Is that your real name?" he continued

I took another drag exhaled into his face and said "It is tonight stud!"

He asked "what kind of a woman are you?"

I smiled seductively and replied
“Tonight I am all the woman you will need"

He laughed and said 'So what do you want of me?"

In a husky voice dripping with desire I said" I want your hot throbbing cock in my mouth'

He replied "It would be my pleasure"

He unzipped his fly, and out popped the largest penis I had ever seen.
I finally understood what hung like a horse meant, it was 9" long and probably 6" around in girth.

All I could say was "Wow!"

Wasting no time I grabbed it with both hand and pulled the head of that huge cock into my mouth. I attempted to swallow it whole but I couldn't manage, I settled for wrapping my right hand around it and sliding my hand up and down the lower part of his shaft, while I opened my mouth as wide as I could and sucked on the head of his cock with all the intensity I could manage, when he came it was a torrent of hot salty cum, my head shot back like I was drinking from a fire hose.

I went into the bathroom, rinsed out my mouth, fixed my lipstick, and put some Vaseline in my ass pussy; I thought to myself that based on the size of his piston, I would probably be better off with Quaker State Motor Oil for a lubricant. I walked back out, he was relaxing on the sofa, and I lit a cigarette and sat down next to him, as I took a long drag from the cigarette in my left hand, I slid my right hand over to his crotch, and he was not even a little bit hard.

I caressed his thigh, exhaled smoke into his face and said, "You are the most man I have ever seen, I can't get enough of you, I want you to fuck me again and again,

I took another drag, and exhaled it slowly and took another check of his cock, it was coming up, but it had a long way to travel.

I said" I want to feel you inside me; I want you to butt fuck me now"

That seemed to do the trick; couple of strokes and his cock was completely erect. I got up put my cigarette in the ash tray, knelt on the sofa facing the wall, reached down and guided the tip of his mega cock into my ass, and then just went for it, I felt like I was just floating with his cock just slightly in my ass, then I started to squirm into exquisite pleasure/pain, I was just getting used to the feeling of something that huge inside me when I felt a blinding pain, he had started to thrust. It was so intense it took my breath away I let out a whimper,

He said" Have I hurt you? Should I stop?"

I could manage only three words in reply "God Don't Stop"

He didn't and kept going with a ferocity that almost knocked me off the sofa, fortunately his cock was so long I couldn't fall off of it. After what seemed like an eternity he came, as his cock shrunk inside me.

We fell asleep on the bed for a while. I lost track of time, I was standing by the window looking out at nothing in particular, smoking a cigarette. I still was dressed only in a waist cinch-er, stockings heels and jewelry.

Gerry walked up behind me and kissed the nape of my neck, I felt all tingly. Then he reached around and started to caress my tits with both his hands as I felt his cock rise and touch my naked ass.

I said "It is peaceful out there, a penny for your thoughts?"

Gerry laughed and replied "the only peace on my mind is getting a piece of your ass"

I laughed, took another drag and exhaled it as I glanced back over my shoulder at him and said "I thought you'd never ask"

I got up on the bed in the doggy position, he stood on the floor behind me, as I felt him enter me I thought to myself " I have had him ejaculate quite a few times tonight so hopefully that will cause him to be longer than usual this time." I am pretty sure he did take longer, but honestly I wasn't watching the clock. As he repeatedly pumped his swollen member into my ass pussy I was in utter ecstasy, moaning

"You're the best!!!" screaming “That's it Stud!!!" as my toes curled.

He called a few days later to set up another date for Wednesday night. I was thrilled and could hardly wait.

I soaked in the bath tub, and then I shaved my body to a nice silky smoothness. I attached my breast forms with adhesive and slipped into a lacy little bra that supported well but concealed very little. Then I slowly slipped on thigh high sheer black seamed stockings and pulled on a white silky low cut long sleeve top, and stepped into a black, a short leather skirt with a broad leather belt. I decided on a different look tonight. I chose a straight, shoulder length blonde wig with bangs. I applied extra thick black eye liner and a combination of shades of blue eye shadow applied just the wrong side of too much Then I outlined my lips to give a full sensual look and applied a very red, extra glossy lipstick and matching long finger nails For the finishing touch I put on a a pearl choker and matching drop pearl earrings, my cubic zirconia ring on my left hand and a gold signet ring on my right and a thick gold bracket on my right wrist. I stepped into a pair of 3" patent black pumps.

But when I got there the thrill was gone in a heartbeat. No more Mr. Nice Guy.
He had pictures of me in compromising positions, a print out of my entire contact list, probably from my blackberry, business, family, friends everybody.
He turned his laptop toward me and a video of our Q&A was playing, before I swallowed his cock whole was playing.

He said "I am sure all your friends and associates would find this video interesting."

I was crushed, and thought to myself, "That's it I am swearing off men for good"

I said " You ass hole, what is this going to cost me?"

He said" Monetarily nothing, but I need your cooperation and everything will be fine"

I said" What do you mean by cooperation?"

He replied "I want you to carry some things back and forth to Canada"
I looked puzzled

He continued "Your business takes you there quite frequently; you are practically on a first name basis with the border patrol guards"

"Shit 'I thought, I was targeted, he put a lot of effort into this"

I said "So what you want me to carry is illegal?"

"No, well maybe sometimes" he replied.

I asked "Who are you and what are you up to?

He replied 'You really don't need to know that, and besides you have no choice"

I asked "So when do I start?"

He said "I'll be in touch"

I said "Fine, then I'll be going"

He said "Not so fast there is something I want you to do"

He walked over to me and put his hands on my shoulders and pushed down until I was on my knees in front of him, then he unzipped his fly and his hard cock sprung out.

He said “I find you perversely erotic"

Strangely that cock that I was so hot for a few minutes ago was now repulsive, but I didn't have much choice. He was in control and I hated it.

After servicing him, I cleaned up and drove a short distance away from the motel, I pulled over and parked and a wave of fear and revulsion swept over me, I was literally trembling.
So many emotions, anger at him, but worse anger at myself for getting into this predicament.

I would meet an older man I only knew as Uncle Paul in Montreal. Each time Gerry would tell me which of several meeting places to go to and the time to meet Uncle Paul. The Alternative plan if either party didn't show was to try again 24 hours later. I always met Uncle Paul in DRAB and I always met Gerry in DRAG. I got the feeling they thought they were being watched so this way it wouldn't look as thought they were meeting with the same person.

At first it was just papers that I carried, every once in a while in was a computer thumb drive and once it was just a nonsensical phrase. The pattern was always the same, I would be contacted on line by Gerry and meet him at a motel, each time it was different. He would give me an item to deliver or take what I had brought for him from Uncle Paul.
And without fail each time I had to suck Gerry's cock.

Finally I had to bring a large heavy package down from Canada. I was worried.
But there was no problem getting across the border. Uncle Paul had said there would be a few more of these.

I am good with faces and always check out my surroundings carefully when dressed.
At one of my meetings with Gerry I noticed a guy in his mid thirties in a car nearby. About a month later I noticed the same guy in a different car.

One night he followed me, I drove right to the airport what I knew was a little used parking garage and went to the top level which was empty. He followed. I turned drove right back at him and stopped, got out of the car and walked over to him.

I said "Who are you and why are you following me?

He took out a badge and said he was Joe Fenton with the FBI and he was interested in my associate, Jameer Punjabi.

I thought to myself "well that's along way from Gerry Siegal"

Then I said “Well Agent Fenton, I am in a big mess and I don't know how to get out of it"

He seemed to relax and said

"Well if you are willing to cooperate there are not too many messes that the Bureau can't fix. I sat in his car and told the whole sorry story to Agent Fenton. He took some notes, to my surprise I spoke to him in my femme voice, coming across somewhat as a damsel in distress. He didn't seem particularly ill at ease with me but who knows how many weirdoes he comes across in his work.

When I was done talking, he said "You have committed several criminal acts that while serious, could possibly be forgiven if you cooperate with us"

I thought "there is that Cooperate word again"

But I asked "what do you mean by cooperate?'

Agent Fenton replied "we will want your help to get Jameer Punjabi, but more importantly we will want you to help get the one called Uncle Paul"

I replied "I am obviously naive or I wouldn't be here, but you have said what would not happen to me if I cooperate, namely you would not prosecute, but you haven't said what would happen to me if I do cooperate."

He looked right at me and said "these are dangerous people, no matter how many we get there are still more. By your own admission they targeted you so they know everything there is to know about you. You would never be able to resume your life as it was before all this happened. We could of course protect you and set you up with a new identity"

I let out a deep sigh.

He continued "It is not much of a choice, if you don't cooperate you will be exposed and go to prison, if you do, you will need to start all over, never seeing anyone you know again.
You need to think it over and be sure of your decision. I need to discuss this with the US Attorney. I'll be in touch"

I said "How?"

I'll email you under the name Charlestownjoe, play along with me in
case they are monitoring your email"

I just nodded and said "OK"

Late the next day I got a wink and a message Date a Cross-dresser from Charlestownjoe. The message was right to the point professing admiration for my anatomy and expressing a desire to meet me in person.

I thought it a little odd that Agent Fenton chose to correspond with Samantha not Sam. But in thinking about it, it occurred to me that my propensity to meet men in motel rooms would not be considered unusual if Jameer's people were watching me.

I responded playing somewhat coy. He was quite ardent in his pursuit and I agreed to meet him at a local motel.

He said The US Attorney would let me walk in this only if I helped them get both Jameer and Uncle Paul. .

The plan was to figure out who Uncle Paul was first.
On my next trip up I would be late for my meeting with Uncle Paul. The FBI arranged for a fender bender in rural Vermont such that I would have a cover story about losing 12 hours or so dealing with my car and getting a rental. In reality The FBI spirited me into a van where I was met by a make up artist. Now I had thought I always did pretty well with my make up but this session was extraordinary. My nose looked thinner my cheeks higher, my eyes much bigger. . The wig they chose was jet black and wavy. When they finished with me I looked nothing like Samantha which was good because we assumed Uncle Paul had seen pictures of me as Samantha.

For the first time in my life as a cross-dresser I knew I passed, not only did I pass I was hot. It was empowering. The make up artist took a couple of pictures of me and I had her send them to my email account.

The meeting was to be in the lobby of a downtown hotel. Joe and I had adjoining rooms. A bit before the appointed time, we went down and had a drink in the lobby bar. Joe was mesmerized by my appearance. I acted very feminine and flirty as would be expected by a woman on a date. I was getting checked out by most of the men passing by and a few not so friendly glances from the ladies. Uncle Paul showed up on time. I told Joe which one he was and he then called his contact with the RCMP to make sure they followed Uncle Paul and figured out who he really was.

Joe and I went back upstairs in the elevator, I could see he was hard but he awkwardly said good night and went into our separate rooms. Despite my swearing off men, this was too good an opportunity to miss but I needed to be quick before he jerked himself off for relief. I slipped out of my dress and slipped off my undies and lit a cigarette. At the back of the room was the door to Joe's room. There was one on both sides. I opened my side and knocked on his door, then turned my back to the door stood with a wide stance. He opened his side, I glanced over my shoulder at him exhaled a plume of smoke and said

"I thought you might prefer to enter from the rear"

He had a deer in the headlights expression on his face. I slowly turned and knelt in front of him, I fished is raging hard on out of his pants, took a drag on my cigarette, blew the smoke on his cock and said

"Maybe you would rather cum this way"

I started by kissing his balls, then I licked them as he groaned, I moved to licking the head of his dick 360 degrees just like it was an ice cream cone. Then I grabbed it with both hands and slipped my lips over it and sucked it all the way into my mouth and then slowly let it out. I repeated that action five or six times each time he groaned louder and louder.

There was no telling how fast he would cum so I figured I should get busy, I grabbed both cheeks of his nice firm butt and started alternatively pulling him toward me and pushing away, it only took a couple of repetitions and he caught on thrusting his hips and pelvis wildly back and forth until a huge load of hot salty cum burst It my mouth. I looked up and said "that was great stud"

I excused my self to freshen up and he went into the bathroom in his room. When I came out his side of the door was closed.

I sat down and relaxed for a bit, in about 15 minutes I heard the door open. I glanced toward the door and the first thing I saw coming through the opening was the head of an erect penis. It was followed by a completely naked Agent Fenton. My first thought wasn't about how well things were going; I was dumb-stuck by what a great body he had.

I said "Well I can guess what you are hereafter'

He said "And what do you want in return?"

I smiled and said "Oh don't worry hon, I'll think of something, right now you just come over here"

It was thrilling to touch his powerful muscular body. I stood up and dropped my robe to the floor, walked behind him and wantonly ran my hands all over his back and ass, and then I came around in front of him and did the same working my way down from his chest to his groin. I grabbed his cock and lead him to the bed and motioned to him to stand next to the bed. I sat on the bed right in front of him and put two pillows behind my back. I leaned back and kicked up my right leg to his left shoulder, then my left shoe to his right shoulder, I wrapped my high heeled shoes together behind his neck and pulled him a little closer, grabbed hold of his cock and carefully inserted the head of it into my ass. I used my legs to draw him slowly toward me, the tip of his cock penetrating me a millimeter at a time.

He started to thrust and I said "No not yet"

I was drew him even closer licking my lips and moaning, I felt him get past my sphincter and said breathlessly " Now Stud"

He started to thrust, short quick powerful strokes at first, and then gradually they got deeper and longer. I loved the feel and the sound of his taut loins slapped against my ass. My balls were flapping up and down which each thrust. I grabbed my hardened cock and started to jerk off my cock. After a couple of attempts I got the rhythm right such that as he powerfully thrust into my ass I stroked my cock. I came first; my cum exploding all over his chest and then I finally felt him fill my ass with his load of cum.

I took my right index finger and flicked a little of my cum off his chest held it up to his lips and said

“Want a taste If you like it I'll show you how to get a lot more?"

He shook his head No, and stood up and literally ran back into his room.

The plan for the next day was for me to leave the hotel in drag, change and come back in drab, check in and meet Uncle Paul.

Joe knocked on the door about 10 AM

I opened it and said in a sultry voice "Agent Fenton "Do you want to come..... In?"

He looked exceedingly uncomfortable and said "No we need to be going"

We drove about an hour outside Montreal and stopped at a really cheap motel.

As Agent Fenton checked in I got out of the car and lit a cigarette, preened and pranced about in full view of the scuzzy middle aged desk clerk.

We went to the room, he turned on the TV. I kept playing with my makeup trying to get the same look as the make up artist, but didn't have the same skill level.

At one point, probably to break the awkward silence, Joe said" It is very odd that you use your right hand on the right side of your face and your left hand to do the left side of your face"
I replied, “Actually I am ambidextrous, I know there is a joke in there about hitting from both sides, but spare me the humor"

Then I stopped preening and just kept looking at him expectantly.

Finally in a fit of rage he said" What do you want?"

I smiled seductively and said "I think you know what I want"

He said" I can't, last night was a mistake, and I don't know what came over me"

I said "I believe it was lust that came over both of us" and continued "What's the problem I thought the FBI was full of gays, wasn't J Edgar Hoover himself a cross-dresser?"

His cell phone rang. He said "The RCMP has some information on Uncle Paul I need to meet with them"

I pouted and said "What a shame"

He replied "you need to stay in this room and talk to no one, in the mean time change back into your male attire"

I said" There aren't enough towels in the bathroom, is it OK to ask the desk clerk for some more?"

He knew full well the desk clerk was ogling me as he checked in.

He said “No I'll get you some towels before I go"

After he did so and got in his car, the room phone rang

I picked it up and a male voice said "this is the front deck mademoiselle, are the towels completely satisfactory?

I laughed and replied "the towels are fine, but the only thing that would completely satisfy me at the moment is a man"

He replied "I'll see to it immediately"

Moments later there was a knock at the door

I let clerk in and said "we don't have much time!"

He was probably 50, a bit unkempt, three day beard growth and he stank of cigarettes and stale coffee. Obviously I didn't have many options so he would have to do.

I shamelessly reached down and felt his crotch, it was hard

I smiled and said “Good you are ready for action"

I knelt down in front of him and carefully unzipped it. There was a faint odor of urine when I fished his cock out. It wasn't the biggest, probably about 6 inches, reasonably thick, but it was uncut and you don't see that many of those.

I grabbed hold of it; I love the look of my bright red nails against a bulging cock. I ran my fingernails up and down his cock; I playfully grabbed hold of his balls and tickled them. He was squirming, so I decided enough fooling around, and pushed back the foreskin and kissed the tip of his cock. Uncut cocks are always a little slippery so you have to work a little longer to get enough friction; it is one of the better features of uncut cocks.
I took my time and started slowly taking the full length of his shaft into my mouth each time, then I started to go faster, and I bobbed my head up and down, faster and faster , until finally his cum exploded in my mouth. I went to the bathroom and washed out my mouth.

When I came back in he was sitting there having a smoke.

He said "That was great, what's next Cheri?"

I said "Next is you better get out of here before Joe comes back"

He said "Maybe just a quickie"

I said "Maybe later" He crushed out his cigarette in the ash tray and went back to work.

Very reluctantly I went about transforming myself back into my drab self.

Agent Fenton and another agent came back about an hour later. They had a car they had rented in my name in Vermont and copies of the Police Report for my accident. It would help prove to Uncle Paul that I had been unavoidably detained.

I noticed that Joe saw the other cigarette butt in the ashtray and he got flushed but said nothing.

I drove into Montreal checked into the hotel and went about meeting Uncle Paul as planned. He was a bit angry at first but I showed him all the documents and he seemed to relax. We walked into the hotel garage, and he pulled a van up to where my rental car was parked. We lifted the heavy package into the trunk and he was off.

I went about my regular work the next day and drove back to Boston that night. I had a text message fro Gerry /Jameer instructing me to meet him the next day at 5PM.

I sent an email to Joe telling him the time but I was never told the place until just before the meeting. The plan was to take Jameer then, the FBI had to coordinate with the RCMP to arrest Uncle Paul and his associates at the same time.

I tossed and turned all night. I thought about how this nightmare was coming to a close but so was my life as I had known it. I thought about Gerry/ Jameer and how much I hated him. I wished I could get revenge but I knew that the only revenge I could expect was to see to it that he was captured. I also thought about me. Obviously my swearing off men hadn't worked. Falling for the wrong guy had gotten me into this mess. Falling for a nice guy like Joe had only brought me incredible sexual frustration and was clearly tormenting him.

I put on a lacy bra, waist cinch-er and sheer black thigh highs and a gaffe. I decided on the same blonde wig as when I first met him, my make up was conservative a little less eye makeup than usual and a medium shade of red lipstick. I put on a white long sleeve blouse, and a tight black leather skirt and sheer black thigh highs, and 3" black heels. Probably because revenge was in the back of my mind, I went to the kitchen and got a small about a 3" blade, sharp knife and put it in my bra.

I got a text message directing me to a motel where we had met before. I in turn sent one to Agent Fenton. I got there and went to the room. As I walked in Jameer slapped my face very hard. I was surprised and angry.

He shouted "that's for missing your meeting"

I said "I had an accident; there was no way I could get there on time"

He said "come and help me get the package'

I sneered' Not man enough to do it yourself'

We went to my car and moved it to his trunk.

The plan had been to take him when we were outside, but nothing happened.

I said "Well then, I'll be going"

He grabbed my arm and said "I am going to punish you for your insolence"

We went back in the room and he pushed me away and unzipped his fly

Just then “I heard a voice on a loud speaker."Jameer Punjabi This is the FBI, come out and surrender peacefully"

He turned and looked at me and said "You cock sucking slut"

Then he looked out the window as he took an automatic pistol out of his jacket.
He came over and grabbed my right hand and twisted it behind me and said

"Bitch! You will be my shield and when we get away I will kill you very slowly"

He opened the door and pushed me out in front still holding my right arm behind me.

I heard Agent Fenton say "Hold your Fire"

Jameer yelled "Let me drive away and don't follow or she dies"

As we moved toward his car I knew I had to do something. With my free left hand I reached into my blouse and found the knife in my bra. I gripped the hilt. We were moving sideways so my legs were fairly far apart. I swung the knife down between my legs, hoping like Hell to hit his upper thigh, and not my own ass.

He screamed in agony, I spun around and took the gun out of his hand as he collapsed in a heap still screaming. Maybe it was just luck or maybe some vengeful power guided my hand, but the knife went right through his penis and into his balls.

The FBI had had an EMT standing by in case of injury. He managed to stop the bleeding which was considerable. As they put him in the ambulance the EMT looked at me and said "Well this fucker won't be fucking anyone again."

Joe was profusely apologetic about the screwed up timing

I just said "I need to go to the bathroom".

He said" Are you hurt?'

I said "No I just need to go"

I went back into the motel room and vomited my insides into the toilet. Then I realized I had wet myself somewhere along the way. So I took off my gaffe and dried myself off.

When I came back out he showed me to a black SUV and said
"Go with them, they will take care of you"

The people in the SUV were from the US Marshal's Witness Protection service.

Actually I never had to be a witness. Uncle Paul and his associates put up a fight with the Mounties and he was killed.

Jameer not having much to live for after they patched him up, decided to try to be a martyr for Islam and pleaded guilty as charged thinking he would get the death penalty. Instead he got several life sentences. I sometimes wonder what sexual role he plays in prison.

I never saw or heard from Joe again.

As for me I was relocated to the West Coast and given a new identity and a Government Job. It was OK and paid pretty well. The big bonus was the plastic surgery. When I went for the first consultation, I showed the Surgeon the pictures of me from my makeover by the Bureaus makeup artist.

I said" I want to look more like that"

He looked at the pictures and then at my face and said "Are you planning to undergo Sexual Reassignment Surgery"

I said "No"

He replied "You would look a bit odd as a male"

I smiled and said "I am really not concerned about what I look like as a male!"

The surgery was pretty successful. As a male I wore my hair very short and bulky eyeglasses. I looked kind of geeky but I didn't care.

All that was important was that when I dressed as a female, I looked oh so hot.

You see I had finally figured out that it wasn't men I needed to swear off, it was relationships with men. I just went about using men for sex. Some knew I was a cross-dresser, some who got a quick blow job probably didn't. Anyway they probably all saw me the same way. In their eyes I was a slut. In my eyes they were walking talking penises.
I know I sound shallow, but after coming so close to death, the only depth I wanted in my life was depth of penetration.