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Chatting with Angels

By Sasha Zarya Nexus

With editing from Holly Logan and Angel O'Hare

 

Chapter Two - Bernadette

Kathryn woke with a start glancing at the clock on her nightstand to reveal that it was only 6 AM. She picked up the remote to turn on her TV and change it to the weather channel. It was Saturday Morning. She marveled that such a supernatural experience could have happened in the space of a single night and there still be time for her to have received one of the best nights sleeping of her life.

Kathryn dressed for the day in her traditional sweats for the cooler months for staying around the house. She brushed her fiery auburn hair full of natural curls into submission. While she knew how to be Stylish when it called for it because she was a ground breaking business woman who ascended to the pinnacle of her industry well before the old boys network had been broken and the glass ceiling was so thick that it seemed impossible to break. While it had taken her being 10 times as good as any man better, even that didn't seem to be a full use of her abilities as she balanced business and a full set of social engagements. The only chink in her presentation came because she had to use very expensive alternatives to cosmetics due to numerous allergies so she came to prefer the fresh face look if at all possible. She was used to being a role model for numerous women but the prospect of being a role model and mentor to the one person who she thought would break her jinx of being left at the alter was a bit much to take.

Kathy wondered if she would ever get used to knowing things that most others don't know. She reflected that she's been trusted to being the holder of Prophesies and also to act at the proper time concerning people close to her. She sometimes had to be careful of using her knowledge for fear of interfering in the normal course of things and worse yet causing a paradox. Fortunately her interest in Science Fiction had done much to prepare her for her tasks.

It amazed her that she had not freaked out as she should have done having been witness to such a supernatural revelation. She reasoned that the Angels had a calming influence on the person receiving the message or else the message would be lost in the enormity of it. Another lasting influence appeared to give the listener the serenity to digest the message in little pieces as they were ready, instead of being overwhelmed by everything at once.

Kathy thought, " A promise is a promise! And I promised Bernie that anytime I received an angelic visitation that she'd get a full report. I'm lucky that she's my best friend and knows how to keep a secret."

Bernadette lived on the other side of Atlanta and was a member of the USS MacLeod. In fact it had been Bernie who had convinced her to become the ship's captain when Kathy's cousin Gail had stepped down due to health reasons. It had become their tradition to spend early Saturday Morning on the phone. Bernadette has an angelic quality to how she was perceived in her ordinary life. She taught school to special needs children. Those children were so lucky to have her because she poured all that she was into teaching them. Bernie was also a devout Catholic who had never had any angelic visitations that she knew of but was always eager to hear about Kathy's experiences.

Kathy prepared coffee and a Danish and got comfy in the living room throwing her coverlet over herself. She picked up the cordless phone and headset and dialed Bernie's number automatically. Kathy picked up her beading tray and jewelry pliers to continue making the bead and wire necklace that she had started.

"Hi Kathy, How are you this morning? Did you sleep well?" Bernie looked over to her 'child' to make sure that she wasn't getting into too much trouble.

"Hi Bernie, I had just about the best sleep in my life. I guess its compensation for my life being turned upside down." Kathy hoped that Bernie was ready for what was to come.

"Kathy, What's wrong sweetie? Do you need me to come over? Did an angel visit you last night?" Bernie knew that the answer to her last question was a resounding, Yes!

"Bernie, I feel more alright than I should but now I just need to talk. Maybe you could come over later?" Kathy was more composed now and did not want to overly upset her friend.

"Sure Kathy, we can talk now. You didn't have a chance to answer my last question... was I right?" Bernie smiled. She enjoyed directness and getting right to the matter at hand.

"Yes Bernie, an Angel came to see me. You have to swear to keep this secret." Kathy had confidence that Bernie would keep it secret even though this is going to be the most difficult secret she had entrusted to her.

"Always Kathy, but you know that so it must involve someone close to us. I swear to keep it secret." Bernie was filled with anticipation hoping that Kathy would tell her already. Bernie observed that she may have to drag it out of her. She hoped that maybe a little humor would help.

"There is a lot that I haven't processed yet, but I can give you the jest of it. It was about Monty." Kathy felt triumphant that she'd said Monty's name. Kathy questioned if she was going to have the courage to share the rest.

"You told me that you were in love with Monty, That he was always a perfect gentleman and the first guy who never ever even glanced at your boobs. As big as they are, girl, that is a miracle!"

They giggled together as Kathy replied, "Don't I know it!" Kathy appreciated Bernie lightening the mood with some humor. She realized that was just what she needed.

"You found out that he is trainable since your were able to use your feminine wiles to make it more fun for him to do what you wanted only he would have done it without your extra influence."

"I have to keep in practice to uphold the traditions of us southern belles. I'm glad that its not necessary in Monty's case." Kathy was putting the necklace together by connecting the wire links that ran thru each bead. It helped her to keep her hands busy.

"In some ways you said that he was too good to be true. When he showed his soul, you said that it was beautiful in every way but that he appeared to be hiding something and that seemed to make seeing his soul difficult. So did the angel tell you what Monty is hiding?" Bernie was frustrated and wanted Kathy to give up the rest . She hoped that she would not be kept in suspense much longer.

"Let's just say that Monty won't break my Jinx from having three men leave me at the alter." Kathy saw from the look in Bernie's eyes that she was still clueless from her attempt to break the news to her easy. Kathy resolved that she was going to have to just come right out and say it.

"So give, Lady, Why wont marriage work for you two? What's he hiding?" Bernie hoped that she would go ahead and answer already! She wondered how many times would she have to ask. Bernie was clearly frustrated with the word games at this point in their conversation

"Monty is really a woman, a transsexual." Kathy's face showed the relief that she felt from finally saying it.

"Are you sure? He doesn't seem to act that feminine around us." Bernie considered that on the other hand that would clarify exactly what was going on with Monty.

"That's the macho facade that we perceive that isn't true. The one that he has erected to shelter himself from the verbal abuse his parents gave him when he finally confided in his parents as a child." She used the pliers to turn the wire hook that she had inserted in the other bead wire's eye into an eye of its own and completed another link of the necklace.

"Poor dear, Doesn't he know that we are truly his friends and that he can drop it around us?" Bernie knew that she really want to help. She admitted to herself that this is going to be a tough secret to keep but that she would keep it.

"He's been faking it for so long that he believes that its simply a footnote in his past that is no longer relevant to his life so he wouldn't be comfortable dropping his facade even among friends." Kathy put down the necklace and got up and began to pace. Kathy mentally exclaimed, "'Thank goodness for cord free phones!"

"I guess the perfect man is a myth. Here we thought that we had found one and he turns out to be one of the girls." Bernie wondered what this was going to do to Kathy. Bernie was quite flustered on how to deal with it, herself.

"I don't think that even if I found a perfect man that he would keep that halo for long hanging around me." Kathy giggled and was glad that Bernie always knew what to say to make her feel better.

"Well you know that I'm cool with Monty what ever he wants to do." Bernie took solace that Kathy knows that she has a couple of transsexuals in her family so the news about Monty isn't totally shocking for her.

"How are those twin cousins of yours who both turned out to be transmen?" Kathy straightened the wooden plaque hanging on the wall with a wood burning of the USS Voyager that she had been taking to Sci-Fi conventions to have signed.

"Their transition is going well since I and a number of family members have completely accepted them." Bernie suddenly realized with alarm that Monty's parents did not sound like the type to be supportive.

"It looks like Monty is going to need all the friends that he can get. From the sounds of his parents, they don't seem like the type to be all that supportive." Kathy had confidence that she could count on Bernie's help when the time comes for both her and Monty.

"So what do we do about this?" Bernadette turned to her large pet cat who demanded her attention and always got what she wanted from Bernie.

"We do nothing until Monty makes this public himself. The one thing that I processed is that it is essential for Monty to come forward himself when he is ready." She walked into the kitchen and selected a mug from the wall on the left that were covered with them from top to bottom so she could make a cup of tea.

"So we just bide our time and wait. We just keep treating Monty as the man he appears to be." Upon receiving the proper offering, Bernie's cat was satisfied and turned away on her next mission of great importance.

"Yes." replied Kathryn with a sigh Kathy considered that this was not going to be an easy prophesy but it would be a labor of love.

"Isn't that going to be difficult for you since Monty has made no secret that he admires you and would like to be closer to you?" Bernie could hear the exclamation from the Lost in Space robot in her mind, "Danger! Danger, Will Robinson!"

"Maybe Monty is subconsciously looking for a role model for when he begins his new life. In any case, I'll have to use restraint so that we are just platonic." Kathy observed that Monty may not read her restraint as an act of love and feel frustration.

"That should be easy since he's such a gentleman. That certainly will put a crimp in your social life to have Monty around all the time." Bernie reflected that all the nice guys will assume Kathy is taken when a hunk like Monty is around. Bernie wasn't really ready to think of Monty as just a girlfriend, yet

"That's true and that is something that I'll have to deal with without hurting Monty's feelings if this goes on for a long time before Monty comes out." The cup with the tea bag brewing inside it was ready to come out of the microwave with a ding.

"Are you sure that Monty will come out?" Bernie remembered that the twins had a crisis before they came out when they were considering suicide and that made the family realize how serious this was to them.

"The angel said that Monty will go thru a crisis and will either face the truth or be subjected to some dire consequence." Kathy resolved that she felt it was part of her mission to make sure Monti survives her crisis. She remembered that at that point it would be Monti from then on.

"Hopefully, we'll be able to show Monty that we'll support his decision and be the friends he'll need." Bernie hoped that she would be able to get Kathy thru the experience as well.

"I'll be watching him closely and we'll be able to help him when the time comes." Kathy removed the teabag from the mug and began to sip the tea.

"Monty came to the right place since we are the 'Wackiest Ship in the Fleet'! Nothing fazes us much." Bernie glanced at the clock. She had that school function to attend and she had to get ready for it.

"Guess I'll let you get on with your day. I feel so much better that I think I'm back to normal... almost. Thanks so much for letting me share with you! Bye Bernie!" Kathy was really thankful to have Bernie as her friend.

"Let me know if you need me to come over later. Bye Kathy!" Bernie thought, "And so it begins... Hope I will be ready... Now I have to get ready!" Bernie left her chair and went into the bedroom with her cat trailing behind her.

As she hung up the phone, Kathy thought, "'I guess all that there is left to do is to bide my time until the other shoe falls. I hope that I will be ready."

Kathy turned on her computer. She had found that it was always a good idea to check it after Monty had been tinkering with it to make sure that every thing was still alright. It came on and Kathy put it thru it's paces. Every thing seemed to be working perfectly! She was glad because even though the conversation with Bernie had helped, there were still things that she had to process from her chat with Della. She hoped that she will have sorted most of this out before the next time Monty spent an extended amount of time alone with her. She smiled and patted her computer monitor lovingly. "And my baby makes three!" she told her computer.

Ring! Ring! Kathy picked up the call fortunately not having removed the headset yet. "Hello! This is Kathy." Kathy wondered who could this be? and she also wondered if Monty's ears could be burning?

"Hi, Its Monty. How are you and your computer doing today?" He hoped that his work would hold since Kathy's computer seemed to break down when she needed it the most.

"Hi Monty! We both are doing fine. I turned him on and put him thru his paces and he performed beyond my expectations. You did a wonderful job, Monty Thanks so much for the help!" Somehow she felt a sense of peace engulf her being. God was going to give her what she needed for this.

"I'm glad everything is OK with your baby. I had the day cleared just in case I had missed something and you still had problems." Monty sighed with relief that he had gotten it right.

"No problems here! I know you love spending Saturdays playing with your niece. So I won't have to take you away from her even though you know I love to have you around. Since I won't have to baby-sit, I've got some errands that I need to run." Kathy reflected that she had a feeling that her computer would be fine for a while so she could adjust to what she need to be to Monty. Kathy resolved to not tempt fate and ask him to upgrade anything for a while.

"Jessica, my niece, is going thru a phase where her anxieties and emotions seem huge to her. I have no clue about what she's going thru. I'm supportive and help her to see that even though her emotions are real that the conclusions she's drawing about them may not be." Monty wondered if it had anything to do with her entering puberty.

"That's exactly what she needs right now. She's lucky to have you for an uncle!" Kathy observed with amusement that there would come a time when Monti wont be clueless when she has the experience, herself.

"Well I'd better let you get to your day and me to mine. Bye, Kathy." Monty went to find what his niece was up to.

"Bye, Monty." She hung up the phone and removed the headset. Kathy thought, "I guess I had best get out on my errands before the phone rings again!" She changed into a blouse and slacks and brushed out her hair. She picked up her purse and car keys. Kathy was relieved to know that she would have help dealing with the prophesy now.

Monty found that Jessica was eager to come visit in his room. They loved to role-play together with each of them taking on characters from their imagination. Sometimes it fit better with the situation that they were role playing if Monty took on a extra female character. Jessica never seemed to mind and in fact she thought that her uncle was 'cool' that he spent so much time with her. It amused Jessica even more that Monty would use a feminine voice when playing a feminine character to keep her different from Monty's other character.

Jessica was the only one in the family that Monty would let his guard down around. He remembered just like it were yesterday when he found out how disastrous it was to not keeping things hidden. It happened years ago when Monty was 12. He knew where there was a box of his mothers old clothes that she had forgotten about but could not throw away that fit him. When he would play dress up, magically Monty was no more and Alice the girl was there instead. As Alice she could be her true self. She wished for something better and nicer but the cast off clothes were all that she had. She had was quite frugal with her allowance and money that she had earned so she had this idea that since the box of old clothes were never bothered except by her that it would make a good hiding place if she were to get some clothes of her very own that would fit and be an up to date style.

Alice had a plan on how to get her a new dress too even if she didn't have a bike and the nearest department store was 2 miles away. She would get Monty to walk all that way and have him buy a dress for her. Then Monty would go to the bathroom and put on her dress underneath his regular clothes and walk home. The one thing that Alice had not considered was that it was the middle of the summer in Georgia and wearing 2 layers of clothing was going to be really hot. The thrill of wearing a dress finally outside even if it were under boy clothes was something that she was willing to deal with the discomfort to do.

Monty followed thru with the plan and everything went alright. He even worked up the courage to pick out a dress at the store and present it for payment. The dress she picked out was a bright red knit shirt dress that was exactly what she wanted. Changing into the dress in the bathroom and putting his boy clothes underneath seemed to work too. No one said anything if they had noticed anything out of the ordinary when he left the drugstore bathroom and went outside the store to walk the 2 miles home. Even though the walk home was hot and sweaty, the satisfaction of finally wearing and having a dress like she ought to have had from the beginning sustained Alice, incognita.

When Monty got home, the first thing that he did was to take off the dress and put it in the washer to get it clean. Unfortunately, Monty's mother stopped the wash and pulled out Monty's shirt dress.

"Monty, Come here!" screamed Monty's mother. The shock on her face had muted her anger.

"Coming, Mother!" and Monty stopped dead in his tracks when he saw his mother holding the damp red shirt dress.

His mother asked him sternly, "Where did you get this dress, Montine, and why do you have it?"

Monty answered, "I bought it at J.C. Penney today. I wore it under my clothes going home so it needed to be washed. I got it because I am really a girl inside, Mom"

Monty's mother answered, "You are not a girl and no son of mine is going to wear a dress. This is serious, Montine. You are to stay in your room until your father comes home and he can deal with you properly." Monty did as his mother told him and waited in dread for his father's arrival. It was so silent in the basement and his room walls so thin that Monty could hear his mother take the wet dress and put it in the dryer to dry.

Finally the wait was over and Mom and Dad came downstairs and instructed me to open my bedroom door. Mom was holding the dress while Dad was more angry than Monty had ever seen him before.

"Come out to the Family room and be seated, Montine!" Monty silently took his seat and looked across at his fuming Dad and bewildered Mom.

"Montine, Tell me why you bought that dress. You are lucky that your Mother has told me that the dress did not show when you came in from buying it." shouted Monty's Father.

"Daddy, I'm really a girl inside. I've always been a girl and since I am a girl I wanted to wear a dress like the other girls wear. I don't get any thrill out of wearing it. It just seems the right thing to wear and I feel so out of place wearing boy clothes."

Monty's Father yelled at Monty, "Montine, you are a boy and you will always be a boy. I don't ever want to hear of you ever wearing girl's clothes again!" Monty was silent, knowing that he couldn't reason with Daddy when he was consumed with anger as he was now. He feared what would come next.

Monty's Father yelled again at Monty, "You will never wear girl's clothes again. Wearing girl's clothes will send you straight to Hell when you die. Do you understand me, Montine?" Monty's father saw that Monty was so paralyzed with fear that he couldn't answer.

Monty's Father was very angry but calmed a little so that he could repeat what he said to Monty thinking that his voice was so distorted with the angry yelling that he could not actually understand what he was saying. Monty's Father continued no longer screaming but with a firm angry raised voice." Montine, you are never again to wear girl's clothing! Do you understand?"

Monty knew that he had to respond this time so he found his voice and said, "Yes sir, I understand. I will not wear girl's clothes ever again." Monty dreaded even more what would come next.

"Montine go into your room and pull down your pants. Maybe the belt will help you remember not to do this again."

Monty silently went into his room and pulled down his pants and bent over the bed waiting for his father. His father came into the bedroom and closed the door and he took off his belt and doubled it in his hand to use it as a weapon to punish Monty. Monty could not see his Father as he stood behind him and began to punish him by yelling at him with strikes of the belt on his behind in between words. "Montine" whack " You" whack "are a " whack "boy!" "You" whack "will not" whack " wear" whack "Girl's " whack "Clothes" whack "Stupid" whack "crazy" whack " thing" whack " The older" whack "they get" whack "the stupider" whack "they get" whack. The beating continued in the same way for several repetitions until he finally had exhausted his anger. Monty knew that until his father had stopped then he had to mute his cries of pain.

Finally it was all over and with his father upstairs he could cry and let it all out. Monty's world had turned upside down. Until that day, he was sure that his Daddy and Mother loved him but now there was no doubt that they hated him. Little did Monty suspect that in spite of the beating that they had already dismissed his affirmation that she was a girl as a creation of imagination and something that would pass away soon. The beating was just to banish it sooner never to appear again in their eyes.

Monti sobbed uncontrollably as she experienced anew the beating from so long ago. Even after all these years, Monty feared for his life if he ever were to present himself in front of his parents as a woman. The woman within Monty had been repressed so much and thoughts of revealing her were consumed with guilt that he truly believed that Monti could be kept locked away in a quiet corner of his brain never to see the light of day. Monti crept out thru the cracks but only in other ways since she would not be allowed to wear a dress even now.

Monty started to recall the one person in this life who brought real joy to his heart. He saw her dark auburn hair that framed her face and tumbled in curls down to her shoulders, He saw the hint of mischievousness in her green eyes that he could lose himself within. He saw her cute turned up nose as an ornament above her mouth with the red full lips that was always smiling and giggling. Her rosy cheeks never needed makeup as did none of her face since her great beauty was such that using makeup would only diminish her natural look. Kathryn was the girl of her dreams, that is if Monti grew up to be like her then it would be her dream come true. Monti was back again from the brink but it was a war that she was not winning and she feared what might happen in the future.